Catching Up: March 17-March30

Spent a couple weeks in Utah to visit my grandfather. He health is declining and we don't know from one moment to the next if he is going to pull through. He's been battling a rare form of liver cancer as well as heart and gull bladder problems. I won't go into details but it is not good. Joe and I had discussed me flying back to see him as it might be my last/only chance, but it was "never a good time." Finally Joe came to me and said, "Enough. It will never be a good time. There will always be something you think you need to take care of. You're leaving Saturday. Done." Or something close to that, anyway. I didn't end up leaving on that Saturday (it was just too close), but I did leave for Utah the following Wednesday morning (what was I thinking with the crazy early flight?!). Thank you, Joe, for making me go. My time with Grandpa Porter was wonderful, amazing, and exactly what I needed. It was a slice of heaven filled with peace.

A lot happened while I was there and I wish I'd been better about blogging in the moment. (Those are usually better than these distant recaps.) I learned much about myself while I was there. It's a great place to think about life and ask the tough questions as my grandparents always seem to know where I can find the answers. I learned a lot about my grandparents too. It was like being a fly on the wall watching their cute exchanges and seeing them love and take care of each other. They really do, you know, love each other. The special looks and sweet kisses. The sacrificing they do for the other. It was beautiful to watch and to be a part of.

I only had one picture taken while I was in town. Me and Grandpa. But it's on Grandma's camera so I don't have a copy yet. Need to convince someone to get it off and email it to me.

I also had the chance to visit all my brothers and sisters (Burns included!). It worked out wonderfully to stay with the grandparents the whole time and just hang out with each family on their own day. It gave me quality time with the siblings and nieces and nephews that I miss so much. I can't believe how much the children have grown! I miss them... lots. They are each so unique and wonderful. I realized during my visit that I don't miss Utah at all (good-bye forever brown desert!), but I miss the PEOPLE tremendously. My little heart aches.

Joe's family was so nice as to help us get Joe out for the weekend. He didn't get the same great visiting opportunities as I did because his time was so limited, but I am grateful for the chance he did have to see his family. He pretends to be strong, but I know he misses them.

I had to return to Maryland all too soon. I was conflicted, feeling like I needed more time but feeling the need to be home too. I am so grateful for the opportunity to visit and to see so many of my friends and family. Love you guys!