After too long of writing and not writing then writing and not writing, I've decided to pull Ellie from blogging. I know it seems silly, but the pressure of making her presentable (even though I said I wasn't going to do that anymore) is stifling. So, I'm shutting her down. Well, at least her blog anyway. I'm going to keep writing her story (because I really want at least one project that I actually finished).
Thank you for those who have remained interested in her even though my posts have been few and far between. If you still want to know what happens, send me an email at endlessbrainvomit@gmail.com and I'll send you the first draft when I am finished (my plan is by April, if not sooner). I'd love your feedback!
Also, if there is anything you're dying to see happen in the book, let me know. I'll see if I can work it into the story. Lots of love... me
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Merry Christmas and (just in case) a Happy New Year!
Pictures didn't get taken. Cards didn't get mailed. Presents (almost) didn't get purchased. But other than that, I think we're ready for Christmas! I've spent the last few days writing and taking care of very-last-minute things for the holidays.
Tonight we are headed to the Calder's for food and fun. About 2 hrs before dinner I decided it would be a great idea to make Lion House rolls (which take about 3 hrs). Thankfully Chantel is running behind too so it should all work out.
Tomorrow we're having the missionaries over for breakfast. I've put together a couple of stockings for them with treats and things. We're trying new traditions and I hope this one works out. We always had the missionaries over as kids and I loved it. Though I'm a little nervous considering I don't have any gaming devices or other things for them to do while I cook. I hope they're not too disappointed. At least the food should be good! The bacon, eggs and hashbrowns staple. For Christmas dinner we are headed to the Greenwood's. She's my awesomely pheonomanal RS pres and I love her daughter. I'm using the opportunity to make Grandma B's famous oatmeal cake as well as a hot grape drink I discovered YEARS ago. Leave it to me to try brand new things when I'm taking it to someone elses house. Joe thinks I'm crazy and maybe I am. I'll let you know after tomorrow!
Anyway, Merry Christmas everyone. Know that we love you and were thinking of you all the way over here in Maryland. We hope you have a safe and happy holiday season!
Tonight we are headed to the Calder's for food and fun. About 2 hrs before dinner I decided it would be a great idea to make Lion House rolls (which take about 3 hrs). Thankfully Chantel is running behind too so it should all work out.
Tomorrow we're having the missionaries over for breakfast. I've put together a couple of stockings for them with treats and things. We're trying new traditions and I hope this one works out. We always had the missionaries over as kids and I loved it. Though I'm a little nervous considering I don't have any gaming devices or other things for them to do while I cook. I hope they're not too disappointed. At least the food should be good! The bacon, eggs and hashbrowns staple. For Christmas dinner we are headed to the Greenwood's. She's my awesomely pheonomanal RS pres and I love her daughter. I'm using the opportunity to make Grandma B's famous oatmeal cake as well as a hot grape drink I discovered YEARS ago. Leave it to me to try brand new things when I'm taking it to someone elses house. Joe thinks I'm crazy and maybe I am. I'll let you know after tomorrow!
Anyway, Merry Christmas everyone. Know that we love you and were thinking of you all the way over here in Maryland. We hope you have a safe and happy holiday season!
Saturday, December 19, 2009
I fell asleep in Maryland...
and woke up in freakin' Utah! What is up with that? We are in the midst of what Maryland considers a horrific snow storm. Seriously. People wiped out grocery stores last night of their bread, milk and toilet paper. What we consider a usual dump in Utah becomes the "end of days" out here. Leaders are already talking about cancelling church on Sunday and Joe's work gave him a hotline to call on Monday just in case they decide to close the office. Makes me glad to have our truck and just a little grumpy it won't pass Maryland's state inspection (they don't like lifts here). Anyway, a few last pictures for your enjoyment. The first snow fall melted quickly off the roads. Something tells me this might take a little longer.
Christmas Decor
Our humble tree (which looks so much better in this space than our last home) with stockings hanging in the background.
Our first broken ornament. Josser hit it with his tail during one of his bursts of excitment. It was inevitable considering his tail-of-death.
Our first broken ornament. Josser hit it with his tail during one of his bursts of excitment. It was inevitable considering his tail-of-death.
Our first snowfall in Maryland
This one was simple, beautiful and melted fast... just the way I like it!
One of Josser's favorite activities (when not allowed outside) is to watch the world revolve through our office window. Both he and I can watch time move forward from this vantage point without anyone the wiser. On lonely days I feel more like a spectator than a participant in life. I wonder if he feels the same as he stares through the glass.
One of Josser's favorite activities (when not allowed outside) is to watch the world revolve through our office window. Both he and I can watch time move forward from this vantage point without anyone the wiser. On lonely days I feel more like a spectator than a participant in life. I wonder if he feels the same as he stares through the glass.
Welcome to my very messy house
But I knew if I waited to get it clean, I would never take the pictures. I DO clean the house, by the way. It's just I always forget to take pics after such events. Today I had the camera going so I snapped a few of the house while it was on. So... ignore the mess if you can. If you can't, I really don't care! hehe
So, from the front door you can either go up the stairs, straight into the living space, or take a quick right into the master bedroom area. We're gonna head upstairs first.
At the top of the stairs are three doors. Don't you love options?! Door number 1 (straight ahead and dark) will take you to the second bath and the one we utilize most (no pics included due to privacy issues). Door number 2 (on the right with the light on) takes you to my craft room, which is very messy despite its lack of use. And door number 3 (not featured in this photo but directly to your right) is the office, a.k.a. the Man Cave. Maybe I should change that name considering I spend most of my time in there. Hmmm. I'll have to think about that one. Though I suppose I should let Joe have at least one room that can be his, even if it is in name only.
My work place. I spend HOURS here everyday blogging, writing, tweeting, emailing, IMing, facebooking and more. Want to chat? LOL
Joe's little slice of heaven. Someday he really will get his own place and he won't have to share with me. Then again, I kinda like being close to him so maybe that won't happen after all. Sorry Joe.
Back down stairs (at the front door) we're gonna glance to the right. Yep, that's the door to the master. Again, due to privacy issues we won't be going inside. And don't get too excited, we aren't so crazy in the bedroom as to flip our mattress against the wall. A friend in the ward bought a new mattress and gave us theirs. We're finally upgrading back to a king! And it's only 2 years old! It's just not soft enough for her hubby. Thank you friend's hubby!
This is a glimpse of our masterbath. We don't use it for showering (weird, I know). But it's all tile and so stinkin cold! So we shower upstairs and I get ready down in the masterbath, which ends up working out really well. No steam making the doing of hair a workout routine.
Okay, back to the front door. Going kinda straight (and avoiding the stairs on the left) will lead you into our main living space with is a big and slightly awkward room for the dining and living areas. You can see the dining spot from here. And the floating picture will someday look okay when I get a shelf to float beneath it. At least, that was my thought when I hung this tiny pic next to a huge clock on an even bigger wall.
The living room is to the left. Just enough space for one couch and the tv. It works for the two of us and we adjust for the few friends that aren't too scared to hang out with Josser.
We have a sliding door to the back porch area that comes in handy. It's nice having a gated area where I can send Josser to play when he's getting on my nerves. I can't leave him unattended, but at least he can get a breath of fresh air while I sweep or do the dishes.
Past the dining room resides the kitchen. It's not even close to my old one and I miss my gas stove, but it's cozy and forces me to do the dishes more often (although it may not seem like it from the pics). It was the first place I had decorated when I unpacked. You'll also note a second door to the back porch. I thought it was weird too, but it seems to work out well. We come and go through this door as the parking lot is just past our gate. And I love being able to open it when the kitchen gets too hot. (Yes, I actually cook and I've picked up baking bread.)
So that's our little place. It's just the right size. Clean up is fast and easy when we get around to it. We've just found more joy in being with friends and exploring the area. Okay... and I don't jump for joy at the prospect of pulling out the duster, so sue me! I'd rather find any other excuse (see "my desk" section of this post) than load a dishwasher. Oh well. We can't all be Suzy Homemaker! hehe
So, from the front door you can either go up the stairs, straight into the living space, or take a quick right into the master bedroom area. We're gonna head upstairs first.
At the top of the stairs are three doors. Don't you love options?! Door number 1 (straight ahead and dark) will take you to the second bath and the one we utilize most (no pics included due to privacy issues). Door number 2 (on the right with the light on) takes you to my craft room, which is very messy despite its lack of use. And door number 3 (not featured in this photo but directly to your right) is the office, a.k.a. the Man Cave. Maybe I should change that name considering I spend most of my time in there. Hmmm. I'll have to think about that one. Though I suppose I should let Joe have at least one room that can be his, even if it is in name only.
My work place. I spend HOURS here everyday blogging, writing, tweeting, emailing, IMing, facebooking and more. Want to chat? LOL
Joe's little slice of heaven. Someday he really will get his own place and he won't have to share with me. Then again, I kinda like being close to him so maybe that won't happen after all. Sorry Joe.
Back down stairs (at the front door) we're gonna glance to the right. Yep, that's the door to the master. Again, due to privacy issues we won't be going inside. And don't get too excited, we aren't so crazy in the bedroom as to flip our mattress against the wall. A friend in the ward bought a new mattress and gave us theirs. We're finally upgrading back to a king! And it's only 2 years old! It's just not soft enough for her hubby. Thank you friend's hubby!
This is a glimpse of our masterbath. We don't use it for showering (weird, I know). But it's all tile and so stinkin cold! So we shower upstairs and I get ready down in the masterbath, which ends up working out really well. No steam making the doing of hair a workout routine.
Okay, back to the front door. Going kinda straight (and avoiding the stairs on the left) will lead you into our main living space with is a big and slightly awkward room for the dining and living areas. You can see the dining spot from here. And the floating picture will someday look okay when I get a shelf to float beneath it. At least, that was my thought when I hung this tiny pic next to a huge clock on an even bigger wall.
The living room is to the left. Just enough space for one couch and the tv. It works for the two of us and we adjust for the few friends that aren't too scared to hang out with Josser.
We have a sliding door to the back porch area that comes in handy. It's nice having a gated area where I can send Josser to play when he's getting on my nerves. I can't leave him unattended, but at least he can get a breath of fresh air while I sweep or do the dishes.
Past the dining room resides the kitchen. It's not even close to my old one and I miss my gas stove, but it's cozy and forces me to do the dishes more often (although it may not seem like it from the pics). It was the first place I had decorated when I unpacked. You'll also note a second door to the back porch. I thought it was weird too, but it seems to work out well. We come and go through this door as the parking lot is just past our gate. And I love being able to open it when the kitchen gets too hot. (Yes, I actually cook and I've picked up baking bread.)
So that's our little place. It's just the right size. Clean up is fast and easy when we get around to it. We've just found more joy in being with friends and exploring the area. Okay... and I don't jump for joy at the prospect of pulling out the duster, so sue me! I'd rather find any other excuse (see "my desk" section of this post) than load a dishwasher. Oh well. We can't all be Suzy Homemaker! hehe
Suit Up
This is the suit I ended up with for my job interview. The suit is just a classic brown, but I took Amy's advice and found a shirt that was more inline with my personality. Thought I'd share. I LOVE the shirt and the crazy necklace.
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Monday, December 7, 2009
I can't keep it all straight...
Too much is happening inside my head right now. So many projects to begin and complete, so many service opportunities to follow through on and way too much writing to do than is good for me. (Okay, well maybe not too much than is good for me, but some days it feels that way).
So here are a few updates...
Cheer & Bless
This is my new blog for gals around the world who at one time or another have felt like they don't belong in Relief Society. I decided to move forward with this project (despite my 1 million other blogs) because I feel that some of our pain and awkwardness would be dispelled if we knew other women out there were experiencing the same exact thing. I'm talking infertility, emotional/mental health issues, abuse, and even the dreaded S-E-X! (Really, why can't Mormon women discuss the big "O" w/out feeling guilty?)
The site is in its infancy, but I'd love for you to check it out and let me know what you think so far.
Ellie
I promise she is still coming along! It's been hard with the job search, resume building, networking and interviewing. So, for the sake of you readers, I'm just gonna publish the ROUGH draft as I go. And I mean rough. I'll be asking you which ending I should use for chapters or which direction I should go next instead of taking time to mull it over on my own. This means for my few devoted fans, COMMENTS ARE KING! So pretty, pretty please give me your feedback and (if you like what you are reading) share it with your friends.
Finding Faith
Has become a scripture journal for me. Bounce over there if you'd like to help me with my studies. I could always use a fresh perspective!
Brain Vomit
And of course, Brain Vomit... my brain child. I am still posting random poetry, short stories and personal essays. You'll also notice a tad bit-o advertising. I'm keeping it minimal, but every cent helps at this time of year. (Can I hear an Amen?!) I hope you'll feel comfortable commenting over there. You have the power to take the discussion in directions I'd never imagined! (And yes, poems and my other writings are all discussions. I intend for them to evoke emotion... even if that is anger. So, jump in and tell me what you think!) I'd love to learn from you!
Life
The big news is that I quit my job before I even started it. I know my decision will not make sense to many of you (especially when the economy is so down right now). But in the end, it was my decision and, with the Lord's help, I feel I made the right one for me. We've decided (the Lord, Joe and I) that I need a different focus in my life right now. One that will provide me safety and fulfillment. And so far, I am happier than I have been in almost a decade. I am so grateful for Joe's support and understanding.
Joe is currently serving in the Elder's Quorum and is blessed to have such a wonderful president. The two get along famously, for which I am eternally grateful. I haven't EVER seen Joe this involved in church before and it is exciting to watch. He is even attending ward choir with me! I've just been called to serve at the Mia Maid advisor. I am EXTATIC!!! I've missed the young women and look forward to loving so many new girls. I am also super happy that I'll have the time to devote to YW activities and girls camp this summer (woot!).
On the work front, Joe is HAPPY! He comes home full of energy and smiling. His work is only 20 minutes away so it feels like no sooner has he called me than he is walking in the door. We love our neighborhood and our little townhome. Our ward is FABULOUS!!! and is making us feel right at home. Josser is adjusting and settling in. Though it's harder to walk him due to all the squirrels! He is constantly getting distracted by their jumping, running and playing, lol.
I'll try to get some pictures posted soon. I tend to forget that a good visual is nice to have. (I write like I talk... way TOO MUCH!)
So that's us in a nutshell. I am so grateful for all the friends who've been keeping tabs on us and sending us a note every now and then. We miss you like crazy!
So here are a few updates...
Cheer & Bless
This is my new blog for gals around the world who at one time or another have felt like they don't belong in Relief Society. I decided to move forward with this project (despite my 1 million other blogs) because I feel that some of our pain and awkwardness would be dispelled if we knew other women out there were experiencing the same exact thing. I'm talking infertility, emotional/mental health issues, abuse, and even the dreaded S-E-X! (Really, why can't Mormon women discuss the big "O" w/out feeling guilty?)
The site is in its infancy, but I'd love for you to check it out and let me know what you think so far.
Ellie
I promise she is still coming along! It's been hard with the job search, resume building, networking and interviewing. So, for the sake of you readers, I'm just gonna publish the ROUGH draft as I go. And I mean rough. I'll be asking you which ending I should use for chapters or which direction I should go next instead of taking time to mull it over on my own. This means for my few devoted fans, COMMENTS ARE KING! So pretty, pretty please give me your feedback and (if you like what you are reading) share it with your friends.
Finding Faith
Has become a scripture journal for me. Bounce over there if you'd like to help me with my studies. I could always use a fresh perspective!
Brain Vomit
And of course, Brain Vomit... my brain child. I am still posting random poetry, short stories and personal essays. You'll also notice a tad bit-o advertising. I'm keeping it minimal, but every cent helps at this time of year. (Can I hear an Amen?!) I hope you'll feel comfortable commenting over there. You have the power to take the discussion in directions I'd never imagined! (And yes, poems and my other writings are all discussions. I intend for them to evoke emotion... even if that is anger. So, jump in and tell me what you think!) I'd love to learn from you!
Life
The big news is that I quit my job before I even started it. I know my decision will not make sense to many of you (especially when the economy is so down right now). But in the end, it was my decision and, with the Lord's help, I feel I made the right one for me. We've decided (the Lord, Joe and I) that I need a different focus in my life right now. One that will provide me safety and fulfillment. And so far, I am happier than I have been in almost a decade. I am so grateful for Joe's support and understanding.
Joe is currently serving in the Elder's Quorum and is blessed to have such a wonderful president. The two get along famously, for which I am eternally grateful. I haven't EVER seen Joe this involved in church before and it is exciting to watch. He is even attending ward choir with me! I've just been called to serve at the Mia Maid advisor. I am EXTATIC!!! I've missed the young women and look forward to loving so many new girls. I am also super happy that I'll have the time to devote to YW activities and girls camp this summer (woot!).
On the work front, Joe is HAPPY! He comes home full of energy and smiling. His work is only 20 minutes away so it feels like no sooner has he called me than he is walking in the door. We love our neighborhood and our little townhome. Our ward is FABULOUS!!! and is making us feel right at home. Josser is adjusting and settling in. Though it's harder to walk him due to all the squirrels! He is constantly getting distracted by their jumping, running and playing, lol.
I'll try to get some pictures posted soon. I tend to forget that a good visual is nice to have. (I write like I talk... way TOO MUCH!)
So that's us in a nutshell. I am so grateful for all the friends who've been keeping tabs on us and sending us a note every now and then. We miss you like crazy!
Friday, December 4, 2009
Did you know I'm stubborn?
I didn't. Well, not really. I knew I was feisty, but stubborn? Nah. I'm always ready to listen to and take direction from others? Aren't I? Well before some of you fall off your chairs at my naivety, know that I finally discovered the truth. Okay. Go ahead and ROFL.
So yesterday I picked up a friend, drove us to an RS Christmas social and then took us to the stake center for a temple recommend interview. Simple, right? Ya. It was simple. Except for the fact that I got us lost MULTIPLE times because I wasn't paying attention to the road, street signs, or pretty much anything else. It is even sadder considering I had been to both places prior to yesterday so the whole "it was my first time" excuse doesn't really count. We ended up 20 minutes late to the party (which in Utah is right on time but here they actually start at the time listed! Crazy, I know). This wasn't a huge deal except for the fact that I had the program director in my car with me. This pushed back our end time to 8p which was supposed to be the time I was at the stake center for my interview. If you had looked out your window at 8:03p last night (and if you lived on this particular street) you would have seen two crazy silhouettes that might be women running as fast as they could in heels on a wet street while balancing a plate full of food. Better would be seeing those same silly girls jump into a truck that was not just too big for them, but for the entire state and proceed to complete a 20-point turn to get the mammoth truck out of the neighborhood. Let me tell you, good times. I'm sure the neighbors were shaking their heads and praying for their poperty.
Well, I figured we were on the road so all was well (don't worry I'm getting to my epiphany of stubbornness), but it turns out I shouldn't have taken that for granted. My first mistake was being on auto pilot so I ended up driving home instead of to the stake center. I fixed that error as soon as I pulled onto my street and found my way back to the 29North. Confident in my ability to find the church, I again went on auto pilot as I chatted it up with my friend Annie. At some point I realized I needed to make the connection to the 100 and posed the question to Annie who indicated I should get off on the 40. Absolutely sure I could get to the 100 from the 29, I STUBBORNLY ignored Annie's direction and unabashedly watched as we approached and then passed the 40 exit. Well, to my shame, I immediately learned that I was wrong. (I know, I know, that NEVER happens, right?). While you can get to the 100 from the 29, you can't do it if you've already passed the interchange! The 40 was my last chance and I missed it because of just plain silliness. A 15 minute trip turned into an hour as I continued to try and fix my mistake by blundering into more streets and neighborhoods I didn't know. (I even drove on someone's lawn! But shhh, don't tell anyone.) The Lord must love me because by the time we arrived, the counselor in the stake presidency was just getting ready to leave. (Yeah! A happy ending!)
As I drove around last night, running over lawns and backing into mailboxes, I learned 2 things. One, I REALLY shouldn't be driving a truck in Maryland. And (the more important) 2, I believe the Lord must feel like Annie did last night. He tells me to take this off ramp or that road and I smile and nod, say thank you, and then do my own thing anyway. I'm much too stubborn for my own good! So, I've decided to stop driving and to start listening. At least I'm going to try and do both... maybe not at the same time... but I really am going to put a greater effort into doing what the Lord asks of me when He asks it. Otherwise, I'll probably end up in Outer Darkness, driving over Satan's lawn while running over his mailbox just because I thought I knew the way better than Heavenly Father does!
P.S. No mailboxes were actually harmed in the making of this saga. And I'm not really as bad of a driver as I pretend to be. I'm close, but still decent enough to be entrusted with children and small animals.
So yesterday I picked up a friend, drove us to an RS Christmas social and then took us to the stake center for a temple recommend interview. Simple, right? Ya. It was simple. Except for the fact that I got us lost MULTIPLE times because I wasn't paying attention to the road, street signs, or pretty much anything else. It is even sadder considering I had been to both places prior to yesterday so the whole "it was my first time" excuse doesn't really count. We ended up 20 minutes late to the party (which in Utah is right on time but here they actually start at the time listed! Crazy, I know). This wasn't a huge deal except for the fact that I had the program director in my car with me. This pushed back our end time to 8p which was supposed to be the time I was at the stake center for my interview. If you had looked out your window at 8:03p last night (and if you lived on this particular street) you would have seen two crazy silhouettes that might be women running as fast as they could in heels on a wet street while balancing a plate full of food. Better would be seeing those same silly girls jump into a truck that was not just too big for them, but for the entire state and proceed to complete a 20-point turn to get the mammoth truck out of the neighborhood. Let me tell you, good times. I'm sure the neighbors were shaking their heads and praying for their poperty.
Well, I figured we were on the road so all was well (don't worry I'm getting to my epiphany of stubbornness), but it turns out I shouldn't have taken that for granted. My first mistake was being on auto pilot so I ended up driving home instead of to the stake center. I fixed that error as soon as I pulled onto my street and found my way back to the 29North. Confident in my ability to find the church, I again went on auto pilot as I chatted it up with my friend Annie. At some point I realized I needed to make the connection to the 100 and posed the question to Annie who indicated I should get off on the 40. Absolutely sure I could get to the 100 from the 29, I STUBBORNLY ignored Annie's direction and unabashedly watched as we approached and then passed the 40 exit. Well, to my shame, I immediately learned that I was wrong. (I know, I know, that NEVER happens, right?). While you can get to the 100 from the 29, you can't do it if you've already passed the interchange! The 40 was my last chance and I missed it because of just plain silliness. A 15 minute trip turned into an hour as I continued to try and fix my mistake by blundering into more streets and neighborhoods I didn't know. (I even drove on someone's lawn! But shhh, don't tell anyone.) The Lord must love me because by the time we arrived, the counselor in the stake presidency was just getting ready to leave. (Yeah! A happy ending!)
As I drove around last night, running over lawns and backing into mailboxes, I learned 2 things. One, I REALLY shouldn't be driving a truck in Maryland. And (the more important) 2, I believe the Lord must feel like Annie did last night. He tells me to take this off ramp or that road and I smile and nod, say thank you, and then do my own thing anyway. I'm much too stubborn for my own good! So, I've decided to stop driving and to start listening. At least I'm going to try and do both... maybe not at the same time... but I really am going to put a greater effort into doing what the Lord asks of me when He asks it. Otherwise, I'll probably end up in Outer Darkness, driving over Satan's lawn while running over his mailbox just because I thought I knew the way better than Heavenly Father does!
P.S. No mailboxes were actually harmed in the making of this saga. And I'm not really as bad of a driver as I pretend to be. I'm close, but still decent enough to be entrusted with children and small animals.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
At a Loss
I was surfing last night (the web, that is) and came across an article on the vulnerability of stay at home mothers. The writer asked for comments regarding her plight. She wondered if other wives felt this way and, if so, what advice would they give for changing those feelings. As I read some of the comments before posting my own I was surprised at how many not only felt the same way but went on to express that the SAHM (stay at home mom) role wasn't as important as their husband's income providing role. Or at least that is what I felt as I read their experiences. Some mentioned husband's that won't share the money (he earned it, it's his money). Some mentioned that while they play the homemaker role, they aren't good at it, citing that they're unorganized, don't like to clean, and aren't creative with the kids. Others stated that it would be easier to replace a SAHM than it would be to replace the income of a dad. I ultimately responded with a way-too-passionate response on how we need to change our own self concepts before we can change the feelings of vulnerability and dependency we may be feeling. I am sure I offended someone (which is never my intention but seems to be my consistent outcome... but I suppose we can deal with that in another post). The article and comments have been floating through my brain all night and into this morning. I am left wondering, do more women feel this way? Do you feel vulnerable as a stay at home mom? Do you feel utterly dependent on your husband? Do you believe you are more easily replaceable than your counterpart? I'd love to learn more and understand these feelings, especially from women I know.
I should also express gratitude for the husband I have. It's never been "his" money or "her" money. It's always been "our" money. Though I'll admit I have felt guilty for not working when I know a second income would be helpful, I haven't ever felt like my lack of work effected my access to the bank account. Joe and I are partners and partners share. I'm not even the "perfect homemaker." And I use that term lightly because I don't believe there is such a thing. Women are different. We have different personalities and strengths. Marla is AWESOMELY creative with her kids. I never will be. That is okay. Amy is one of the most incredible decorators. I cheat and still her ideas. Katie--I LOVE your cooking. And while I am no chef, Joe doesn't starve. I'm good for beating my husband and keeping in line! Just kidding... but he does always have clean clothes and I know he can lean on me for my other strengths. Every one of my friends has her own strengths and together I feel like I grow in leaps and bounds. When I find I'm struggling with a particular issue, I know I can call any one of you to receive help or some ideas. We may not know it all, but I think we know who to call to find the answers.
And as far as this idea of "replaceable" goes, that is just plain craziness! I couldn't believe my ears last night! (I guess that would be my eyes since I was reading). Not a single woman I know is replaceable! Our tasks are not lighter or easier, they are just different from our working counterparts. And those women who work and take care of the home, BLESS YOUR HEARTS! I don't know where you find the energy. Could our husbands learn to do what we do? Absolutely. But could we learn to find a place in the workforce and excel? You bet your booty!
Like I said, it breaks my heart to know there are women out there feeling this vulnerability and dependency on their spouses, as if their own role wasn't important. As if there would be zero possibilities for them if their husband left or died. Am I living in a fantasy world? I don't feel these emotions. Maybe I'm clinically insane.
What do you think? What would you say to a woman who was struggling with these emotions? Have you felt this way? If so, would anything I just said be helpful to you or do you feel like I am invalidating your emotions? Thanks for being honest.
To all the women in my life, know that I love you! I value you immensely! The gifts you share, whether in the workplace or at home, are a blessing to those around you. And I don't believe for one nano second that you are replaceable. Because you're not!
I should also express gratitude for the husband I have. It's never been "his" money or "her" money. It's always been "our" money. Though I'll admit I have felt guilty for not working when I know a second income would be helpful, I haven't ever felt like my lack of work effected my access to the bank account. Joe and I are partners and partners share. I'm not even the "perfect homemaker." And I use that term lightly because I don't believe there is such a thing. Women are different. We have different personalities and strengths. Marla is AWESOMELY creative with her kids. I never will be. That is okay. Amy is one of the most incredible decorators. I cheat and still her ideas. Katie--I LOVE your cooking. And while I am no chef, Joe doesn't starve. I'm good for beating my husband and keeping in line! Just kidding... but he does always have clean clothes and I know he can lean on me for my other strengths. Every one of my friends has her own strengths and together I feel like I grow in leaps and bounds. When I find I'm struggling with a particular issue, I know I can call any one of you to receive help or some ideas. We may not know it all, but I think we know who to call to find the answers.
And as far as this idea of "replaceable" goes, that is just plain craziness! I couldn't believe my ears last night! (I guess that would be my eyes since I was reading). Not a single woman I know is replaceable! Our tasks are not lighter or easier, they are just different from our working counterparts. And those women who work and take care of the home, BLESS YOUR HEARTS! I don't know where you find the energy. Could our husbands learn to do what we do? Absolutely. But could we learn to find a place in the workforce and excel? You bet your booty!
Like I said, it breaks my heart to know there are women out there feeling this vulnerability and dependency on their spouses, as if their own role wasn't important. As if there would be zero possibilities for them if their husband left or died. Am I living in a fantasy world? I don't feel these emotions. Maybe I'm clinically insane.
What do you think? What would you say to a woman who was struggling with these emotions? Have you felt this way? If so, would anything I just said be helpful to you or do you feel like I am invalidating your emotions? Thanks for being honest.
To all the women in my life, know that I love you! I value you immensely! The gifts you share, whether in the workplace or at home, are a blessing to those around you. And I don't believe for one nano second that you are replaceable. Because you're not!
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